Four Tips for Youth Worker Wellbeing
Or The Meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything
Wellbeing
Wellbeing is a hot topic at the moment, there are many reasons for this, both personal or individual to each of us and also collectively. There’s a temptation to define ourselves by how busy we are; we look up to those who appear to be ‘productive’; and we are flattered when asked to get involved in various activities in church or at work. The old adage I have heard so many times over the years, ‘if you want something done, ask a busy person’ resounds through much of church life, especially for volunteers but also for paid staff.
I remember being exceptionally busy with church stuff: given responsibility for the Sunday School rotas; for leading Family Time; for youth group; for leading a new Evening Service and so on. There was one couple whose business was running sports clubs for children, who steadfastly refused to get involved in any church stuff other than attending a life group. I remember wrestling with frustration that they were so resolute. Looking back, they had more wisdom than many of us gave them credit for.
Photo by Tikovka1355 from Pixabay
Rest
Having now been wrestling with various levels of burnout over a number of years, I recognise the significance of the rise in awareness about wellbeing and mental health. The phrase I now prefer to use is ‘working from a place of rest’, I came across this quote recently and it blew me away.
“So how much rest is “adequate”?
Science says: 42 percent.
That’s the percentage of time your body and brain need you to spend resting. It’s about ten hours out of every twenty four. It doesn’t have to be every day; it can average out over a week or a month or more. But yeah. That much.
“That’s ridiculous! I don’t have that kind of time!” you might protest – and we remind you that we predicted you might feel that way, back at the start of the chapter.
We’re not saying you should take 42 percent of your time to rest; we’re saying that if you don’t take the 42 percent, the 42 percent will take you. It will grab you by the face, shove you to the ground, put its foot on your chest and declare itself the victor.”
Emily Nagoski – Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle (emphasis mine)
This has been my experience. I have been defeated by the 42 percent. Chewed up and sat on. Wellbeing is not some airy fairy notion of life being all lovely and sweet, of a fairytale world where nothing ever goes wrong, or an unreachable utopia. If you do not take the rest you need for your wellbeing, it will take you. If you do not put measures in place to prevent burnout, burnout will chew you up and spit you out.
Whether you are a youth worker or not, there are some key elements that I would recommend to keep burnout at bay. The best cure is always prevention, so don’t wait until you are struggling to put these things in place.
Reflective Practice.
Give yourself time and space to reflect on the work you are doing. It’s often good to do this with someone else who can help you see strengths and weaknesses in the work. An awareness of your own strengths, your skills and abilities as well as the things that are likely to trip you up is really helpful and best discovered through reflective practices.
Good Boundaries.
I have developed a healthy cynicism about the way in which churches often operate. That adage I refer to above seems to give licence to those who need to keep plates spinning to hand those plates over to someone who has not learned how to say no. That was certainly true in my case. I loved being needed, I enjoyed almost all of the activities I was handed and in some cases I was the one to instigate it. Our family times were in dire need of some creativity and direction, so I took that on myself. But, I never said no to anything. Until I had to say no to everything. Boundaries and learning to guard them are essential to wellbeing. Booking in time off, taking the time off and learning different ways to say no are all part of managing boundaries.
Physical Health.
We need to do the best we can to stay as physically healthy as we can. It’s not always straightforward, but we can all do something to improve our overall health. Eating meals that are balanced, taking vitamin supplements, making an appointment with the GP to discuss something that’s concerning us, getting outside more often, walking a bit more. These are all good things to do.
Practice Supervision.
All of the above can be supported by finding someone from outside of your organisation to have regular supervision with. This will give you accountability in your decisions, support for challenging work practices which are unhealthy and integrity in your work with people. It won’t surprise you to know that I consider this is essential to being resilient in your work with young people.
And Finally
If the best time to prevent burnout is before it happens, the next best time is the point at which it first occurs to you that you recognise some symptoms: exhaustion, overwhelm, heightened anxiety, lack of sleep.
Listen to the voice that is telling you things aren’t right and act on it. Find someone you trust, and ask them for help. Don’t stop asking until you get help. Get in contact with me to find out how I can help. There is no shame in asking for help, it’s a sign of strength not weakness.
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